"Tired of speaking sweetly"

Phroggy's picture



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Most conversations are abruptly halted when one or more members reaches the magic hourly or daily posting limit, and never returns to the discussion, but one may post dozens of 'names of God' without apparent restriction.

This tells me the admin actively discourages discussion on a discussion forum, and encourages the mindless, pointless posting of names of God. How many names do we need for something that has no name? Do folks here really jump for glee when they see yet another name of God posted. "Yay! Another imaginary name for a delusional concept!"

If ego had it's way, it would be safe from all challenge, criticism and alternative ideas. Unfortunately.....it does.

I love this:

Love wants to reach out and manhandle us,
Break all our teacup talk of God.

If you had the courage and
Could give the Beloved His choice, some nights,
He would just drag you around the room
By your hair,
Ripping from your grip all those toys in the world
That bring you no joy.

Love sometimes gets tired of speaking sweetly
And wants to rip to shreds
All your erroneous notions of truth

That make you fight within yourself, dear one,
And with others,
Causing the world to weep
On too many fine days.

God wants to manhandle us,
Lock us inside of a tiny room with Himself
And practice His dropkick.

The Beloved sometimes wants
To do us a great favor:

Hold us upside down
And shake all the nonsense out.
But when we hear
He is in such a "playful drunken mood"

Most everyone I know
Quickly packs their bags and hightails it
Out of town

Hafiz



Quantum's picture

Question for Phroggy

Hi Phroggy, I tried to find where I can send you an email so as not to consumes anyone's thread with my own question, but I could not find the option to send you a note. So, I am sending you my question here on your blog. Hope you don't mind.

I have been contemplating a question for a very long time and I seek your input because I feel that you have information that I might find useful.

Question: How do we handle current, new, incoming negative emotions (anger, anxietry, stress, you name it)?

My own definition of terms below will help convey my understanding/experience of how I handle them. Let’s use the emotion of “anger” as an example, because I am often in touch with that one when my spirited child blesses me with plenty of opportunity to get angry. My wife also periodically blesses me with opportunity to get angry…if you are in a relationship you know what I am talking about.

DEFITION OF TERMS:
Anger, getting mad = Pain (trust me, it is a pain for me)
The “Echo”, feeling strong anger, resentment, about getting angry = Resistance

Question: So, when an event takes places and evokes anger (pain) within in me, what is the best way to deal with that anger (pain)? If I ignore the anger (pain) it becomes suppressed, becomes subconscious, and lodges in my body where it will do cellular damage. From my subconscious, the anger, by the law of attraction, attracts negative angry events, circumstances, and people. I say this from numerous personal experiences.

My reaction has always been an “Echo” type reaction, where I get upset/angry about (resistance) being angry. I don’t like being angry because it is a pain. When I get angry and feel the pain of it, it makes me upset (resistant) to have to feel that discomfort/pain. With me so far? In other words, getting mad (pain) makes me angry (resistant to the emotion of being mad).

In my experience, being angry about (resistance) being angry (pain) only adds to the emotion. It strengthens it, and almost instantly, bad things start to happen. And continue to happen until the negative emotions calm down…or lie dormant where I have to dig them up during meditation to dissolve them.

Tolle says to “accept and allow fully whatever is.” Jesus said “Resist not evil.” Buddhism (?) teaches detachment. The Beatles sang “Let it Be.” How does one actually do this? Yesterday I got angry (pain) again, and rather than being upset (resistance) about the anger, I simply let myself be angry. I watched the anger like a movie. To my surprise, it passed away, and nothing bad happened. At first I was afraid that the emotion of being angry (pain) itself would attract (suffering) negatives events, circumstances, and people. But it did not. And I wondered why. Perhaps it was because I did not add to the anger (pain) by being upset (resistance) about it. Perhaps because I was consciously aware of it and did not allow it to hide like a coward into my subconscious where it can attract damage. And perhaps this is what Tolle describes when he says something akin to “negativity held under the light of your consciousness will dissolve?”

Is what I just described above the actual way to practice non resistance (Jesus' "Resist not evil"), acceptance, (Toller's "Accept whatever is") and detachment (Buddhism(?))regarding negative emotions?

Your thoughts appreciated.

Namaste.

Quantum | Fri, 09/18/2009 - 19:50
Phroggy's picture

Hi Quantum You're right,

Hi Quantum
You're right, resistance to feeling is what causes suffering, not the feeling itself. Feelings by themselves are just feelings, they come and they go. We tend to think they are a problem, and it's this belief they need to change that results in a problem.

If fear is a bad thing, then we wouldn't ever get on an amusement park ride, and yet we'll pay for the priveledge. We pay good money to go see a movie that will frighten us or make us sad. If you can remember the first time your heart was broken, there was a powerful, bittersweet grief that threatened to end your world, and as painful as it is, something in you wanted to hold onto that pain for a while and it's likely nobody could convince you to let go until you had tasted the fullness of it.

And so feeling is the intensity of life, and while we always want to feel the 'good' feelings, part of us knows that joy is only known through sorrow and peace through discontent, love through fear or hate. The polarities define each other, and we live our lives in the movement created by the tension that forms between them.

The sad movie is not usually a problem for us. The depth of feeling can be experienced but it is bounded. It cannot overwhelm us because we know it's not real and will not follow us out of the theater to haunt the rest of our lives. Even the physical pain that we subject ourselves to in running a marathon or climbing a mountain can be endured because we perceive that we are in control of it.

Feeling only becomes sufering when the sense of self projects it into the past or the future, to place blame or seek a solution. The resistance that forms around the feeling is the entirety of the problem. There is nothing beneath or behind the resistance. The body is not permanently affected by any movement of feeling, only the stagnation that results from resistance. Feeling that arises and falls is the response to our lives, not the cause of negative manifestation. The resistance to feeling obstructs the energy flow of the body, influences our perception and soon becomes a destructive, creative force in our lives.

Notice that all of life is the perception of movement, and so thoughts and feelings are only perceived as they arise and fall. Nobody is a victim of a thought or feeling that they cannot be rid of, as any thought or feeling that is simply observed will be seen to arise and fall on it's own. When we believe that we are being oppressed by some feeling, we are actually chasing it; using the mind to recreate the feeling over and over, giving the impression that it is somehow stuck. We may complain that we don't know how to get rid of a feeling, and yet it is the need to resolve it that locks it in place. It's our resistance to feeling that recreates the feeling over and over as we experience it arising and falling. To still the thoughts and simply invite the feeling will demonstrate that it quickly falls all by itself and dissolves in the absence of any thoughts to feed it.

Phroggy | Sat, 09/19/2009 - 20:07
Quantum's picture

Thank you, Phroggy.

This question of how to handle new incoming emotions is important to me, so earlier this morning, before I saw your reply above, I posted it on it's own thread and title, so that it could be visible to everyone for comments. Mind driven as we area, my mind learns a lot from these posts. 'Am enjoying all the food for thought.

I didn't come here to find God. I came to this forum, and came to meditation, to find a way to deal with negative emotions.

If I was a cartoonist, I would draw a cartoon, with bubbles above the heads with the text to describe this. The main character in the cartoon would look like Calvin (from Calvin and Hobbes), and God would be the Old Man, with the long white hair and beard, wearing a white robe with a rope for a belt and sandals on his feet as depicted in one or two Simpsons cartoons. The conversation would go something like this:

Setting: Heaven, prior to birth (...or conception, whatever)

God: I am always with you.

Soul: I know.

God: You can always come to me and be with me.

Soul: Yeah, I know.

God: Often, I am by you, calling to you, but you will not notice me.

Sould: Um...Okay.

God: Some days you will come to be, but you will not feel my presence.

Soul: (More hesitating now) Ummm....o....kay.

God: You will have emotions (both good and bad), but you will have to find a way to deal with them on your own.

Soul: SAY WHAT???!!!!

Quantum | Sat, 09/19/2009 - 21:57
Phroggy's picture

Hehe. Well, fortunately or

Hehe.
Well, fortunately or not, that God doesn't exist, so the search for Truth is the same as "finding a way to deal with" it. Although the truth is that there isn't really a person who owns these problems to begin with.

Phroggy | Sun, 09/20/2009 - 22:09
Quantum's picture

That God

"...fortunately or not, that God doesn't exist..."

:) He he he.

That's okay, Phroggy. May He does, maybe He doesn't. That little script comes from the Roman Catholic in Me. Though I still embrace eastern thought. I was mad at Him once when I was a kid, sp I told Him, "God I don't believe in you anymore." I actually took myself seriously. lol.

I have so much I want to discuss, I don't know where to start.

Perhaps "that God" is a mental idol, a crutch, that helps indotrinate "Faith" into little people to indotrinate them into becoming faithful Christians as they grow older. It seems to work. I see "Faith" in old people, specially from third word Catholic countries. Here in the west, we tend to be very mind dominated, intellectual. So, it still surprises me that there are so many hard core Christians here. But there was a very different "flavor", or "feel" to the religion I noticed in College, from the "faith" I observed from my older relatives. My families' faith seems more "heart based". The religion I saw in school was highl intellectualized. I was confused for a bit, but thank God, only 5 or 10 credits of theology were required.

As you advance though, if you advance, you will ultimately realize that "God" cannot be "known" by the mind. I think it was either St. Augustine, or maybe it was St. Thomas Aquinas who finally said that towards the latter part of life. What he finally said sounded very eastern.

Quantum | Mon, 09/21/2009 - 04:26
Quantum's picture

Forgot to add

I forgot to add, part of what inspired that post was somebody post that said "Pain is not what causes suffering, but the resistance to the pain is what causes suffering.)

Quantum | Fri, 09/18/2009 - 19:57