Freedom from the Past

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"Most people
imagine themselves
to be the sum of their past.

As though the past
is inside them,
is a part of them.

But the past is only inside you
if you are actively carrying it around.

If you are defined by your past
it is only because either
consciously or unconsciously
you are carrying it around,
you are clutching it tightly
and saying "this is me."

And so there are many therapies
that are about coming to terms with your past.

But the end result
is that you let them go.

That letting go is really the key
to spiritual awakening.

People are carrying their 30, 40, 50+
years around with them
and from that identification with their past,
they want to awaken, they try to meditate.

But it is not possible.

Your past cannot be awakened,
you as your past cannot be awakened.

So what to do?
You practice letting go.
You practice being here
without holding on to anything.

Whatever arises,
you do not push it away
and you do not grab hold of it,
you simply be aware of it.
You allow it to flow through
and in that awareness it disappears
back into consciousness.

At some point,
that attachment to
identifying yourself with your past
gets declutched.

That contracted sense of
being bound by a 'me' with a past
gets broken
and you find yourself here,
completely here,
free from past, free from future.

And what arises
in this moment
simply gets burned away
in this consciousness of here.

It gets purified
by the bliss that is your
true nature.

You do not have to
get to bliss,
you are bliss,
everything is bliss.

But because you are clutching
on to so much,
because you are carrying around
your past,
then this bliss cannot be felt.

And spiritual awakening does not mean
you lose your past, you lose your memory.
It is all there like a library.

You can pick up any book
and look at it and think
"remember that time?"

But most of it does not affect you
more than the enjoyment
of a good story.

You are not bound by it,
you are not trapped in any
of the books.

And the deeper you move
into this moment,
the more complete
it comes.

At the highest levels
of consciousness
you look at something,
say you look at ants,
and you are totally
immersed in ants.

There is nothing but the ants.

You could not be anymore complete
in looking at those ants.
You would be happy
to watch those ants
forever and ever.

It is absolute divine ecstasy,
the totality of everything,
the whole universe
is felt just in watching
those ants.

And then you turn your attention
to something else,
and the ants are completely gone.
There is no recollection of them.
What happened even a second ago
has been completely burned away
in consciousness.

And then you feel the totality
of the universe in this moment.

Such bliss!

Much love,

Kip"

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