Can you be spiritually enlightened and in a romantic relationship?

Emma's picture

Average: 5 (2 votes)

What are your opinions on spiritual enlightenment and romantic relationships? I have heard arguments such as: a truly enlightened person loves everyone and everything equally so does not form attachment to another human in the same way. I've also heard the opposite.

What are your thoughts?


suzi's picture

Of course, the body and mind still function

Of course an enlightened person can be involved in a romantic affair. The same way, he/she can be involved in enjoying a movie, a book, a trip. They can even still eat (and enjoy the taste) and have sexual pleasure :-)

You equate romantic relationship with attachment while it's not necessarily so. That is precisely the point: the realized person as well as many non-realized people can love romantically but he/she do not develop attachment or desire to own.

It is important to emphasize: the enlightened person does not die physically or mentally. His body and mind continue to function (indeed some of his conditioning are changed due to the self realization). The difference is that he/she is not IDENTIFIED with these body and mind.

It is true that the desire for romantic affairs and even the sexual urge are usually diminished in terms of the body+mind's conditioning (a bit similar to what usually happens in old age). This is mainly due to the fact that the indirect reasons that push a regular person to romantic love (e.g. sense of security, ego, self worth etc.) do not operate but if one desires to have such an affair, he can. There are numerous examples of probably enlightened people who had romantic relationships - e.g. J. Krishnamurti, Susan Segal, Eckhart Tolle etc.

Can I ask - what made you contemplate on this issue?

suzi | Tue, 04/25/2017 - 07:26