Face the shit!

kadabra's picture



Average: 4.7 (6 votes)
garbage.jpg

Face the shit, don't run away from the decay, from the rotten, from death, from the basic decomposing nature of your physical body, of your psyche, and of any other living organism.

It's difficult, it might be the most difficult task you have ever came across in your life. And yet, you must face this enormously unpleasant and depressing nature of reality if you want to move forward. You know it deep inside.

Your psyche fights to hide from you this terribly depressing aspect of your body, of your life, of your surrounding.

As a living creature you are decomposing, your are dying, you are rotting.

Don't use spiritual excuses in order to avoid this hurdle. Don't say "I'm not the body" in order to continue overlooking the gloomy nature of your body, don't say "I prefer positive thinking" in order to have your thinking mislead you again into a falsely sterile outlook of your being. Don't be afraid of becoming depressed. Otherwise you will never be able to genuinely realize that your not the body, you will never be able to genuinely go beyond the control of your thinking machine.

Without overcoming this difficult stage, you will not be able to move forward on your spiritual journey.

And remember: don't use spiritual excuses in order to avoid this hurdle.



lilian's picture

Brilliant

Brilliant piece. For some reason that I haven't managed to figure out completely yet, one of the mind's main functions is to veil from you this difficult experience you are discussing. I assume that the reason is survival - to defend you emotionally (from getting into depression), to make sure you are identified with your body (how can one be identified with something he just realized deeply that is a chunk of rotting flesh?) and so on.

And so, with that veil it's extremely difficult to have that genuine experience of facing the rotten nature of your body, as you call it. I found out once (by accident) that a good trick is to wake up in the middle of the night (netter on a day that you are especially tired), the mental defensive mechanisms at that point when you wake up are weak and you will see that it will be easier to access the experience. Just wake up and meditate and let those realizations dawn on you, don't be afraid, don't resist.

lilian | Mon, 11/25/2013 - 09:00
MAI's picture

Indeed... TRUTH,LOVE,PEACE MA

Indeed...

TRUTH,LOVE,PEACE
MAI

MAI | Mon, 11/25/2013 - 11:54
zoya's picture

So true! the phase of "inner sewage"

On the spiritual path, at some point starts a definitive and well-recognized phase in which you start to face your crude "inner sewage". It usually starts when your psyche feels that you are strong enough already to undergo this difficult experience. Many times it starts at a point where you believe that "there is nothing left in my subconscious".

It's not about conceptual sewage, it's not something that can easily described in words, it's something extremely crude and primordial like from another dimension. And yet, it is something that lies there deep inside in your subconscious and that these qualities make it so hard to process that you sometimes get scared that you will go insane.

Don't confuse this stage with the "Dark night of the soul". To the best of my knowledge, there are two different things.

The main theme at that stage is to face death, not as an intellectual subject but truly as something concrete, experiential and present.

Ayahuasca is known to assist a lot in the opening of this unconscious realm.

It is indeed an enormously difficult and cruel phase. It is very hard to understand its difficulty outside of the experience, imagination can't really depict the depths and livelihood of this experience. Yet, it is an essential step on the spiritual path.

You cannot force it to happen, it will come when you are ripe enough to undergo it (and when it happens, it will always look to you like you are not ready... but you are).

The best tool to go through this phase is... acceptance. Just to accept whatever you discover, how dirty, how smelly, how crude it is. You will not get insane, don't worry.

zoya | Sat, 12/07/2013 - 21:37
MAI's picture

Kadabra, zoya....this is Fierce Grace

Kadabra, there is a beautiful video by Igor Kufayev, on depression after awakening, mainly caused by the lack of nutrients in the body, due to the frying of the old circuits in the brain. He's explained beautifully the physiological, physical aspects of the impact of awakening, and the various ways in which we can care for ourselves, in the aftermath.
Like you put so well, zoya, it can be quite "cruel", as we go through this phase, on the experiential level, which is what I've tried to describe in my last blog "Fierce Grace."

And it happens spontaneously, when we're ready....whether we think so or not...!!!

Igor Kufayev, has a fb page called : Igor Kufayev~Flowing Wakefulness.
It has many informative and helpful videos, if you care to watch.

20 years ago such information wasn't available, nor any one I knew going through similar experiences.
Inner guidance from the guru, and intuition being the only guides, on this path.

And in sharing one's experience, as Igor does, he helps the same self, that is the self in all.

TRUTH,LOVE,PEACE
MAI

MAI | Sun, 12/08/2013 - 07:14
Annie's picture

I don't think kadabra and

I don't think kadabra and zoya are talking about depression after awakening (I don't think there can be depression after true awakening).

They are talking about a phase in which the substratum of the subconscious is opening up and all that the psyche tried so hard to hide is boiling up to the surface.

Annie | Sun, 12/08/2013 - 09:15
MAI's picture

The Subconscious Opening Up....

Dear Annie,

> " I don't think kadabra and zoya are talking about depression after awakening (I don't think there can be depression after true awakening).

They are talking about a phase in which the substratum of the subconscious is opening up and all that the psyche tried so hard to hide is boiling up to the surface."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yes. There are various stages post 'awakening', though I have seen a lot of people seem to feel they are 'done',{ and I have to confess, that I did, too...!!!} after the stage of experiencing universal consciousness...."the I am nothing, yet I am everything".

It is a blissful state, no doubt, and there is resting in it, for as long as it's needed. {and I call it a resting, NOT a hiding out. }

Each step being complete in itself, tends to give one the feeling, that, that's all...it's over.
In a way it is, too. For that step, at that time.

Post this phase, or actually during this phase, I was fortunate to be internally guided by my guru/inner knowing/ intuition, to go on a diet of uncooked food for 40 days.
I had no clue why, I just followed the inner dictates.

Perhaps that might been the reason, I did not experience any depression.
And it seems, now that I listen to so many experiences, others have gone through, that this does happen , at not only this stage {the depletion caused in the body, by the amount of energy that is activated to burn up those old circuitry, in the brain }, but also when..." a phase in which the substratum of the subconscious is opening up and all that the psyche tried so hard to hide is boiling up to the surface," which is what , as you rightly put is, kadabra and zoya refer to, and also the same phase that I referred to in my last blog " Fierce Grace "

Much as it seems the trend to discard the mind and body as "illusion," and to discard the physiological changes that accompany every step, yet one needs to extend some TLC to them as the whole is impacted by this process.

Self care {and the Self includes the entire self :-) } is important.

Which is the reason for my suggesting a look see at Igor Kufayev's talks, also some more that I have mentioned in my blog "Fierce Grace", namely a series called, Shakti: parts 1-6. Specially part 4 which deals with the Biological Perspective, and part 5 which deals with Awakening & Pain. Surrender. Balance. Integration.

As I myself have experienced, and as zoya and you and kadabra put it, this particular phase of "...in which the substratum of the subconscious is opening up and all that the psyche tried so hard to hide is boiling up to the surface," is also a phase that is bringing up a great amount of energy play, and can seem to be really 'cruel', as alignment of the whole takes place.

As we share and find ourselves as each other's 'sounding boards', we are all enriched.

TRUTH,LOVE,PEACE
MAI

MAI | Sun, 12/08/2013 - 12:10